DearG.J.P.,
Everyday,everymomentthatgoesbyIthinkofyou.Mybraintellsmetogiveup,butmyheartsaysIcan’tstoplovingyou.Ispendalldaydreamingofthemomentyouwouldcalltosayyoufeelthesameway.AsmuchasItrytopretend,thetruthis,Ican’tstoplovingyou.Idon’tknowhowtostop.
Iwillcherishthemomentswehavespenttogether,fromourveryfirstkisstoourlast.Imissthewayyoukissme,thewayyoulookatmeandrubmyface,ImissyoucallingmeMs.Maynard(becauseyouknowitgetsonmynerves),Imissyoumissingme,Imisseverythingaboutyou,Imissourphoneconversationsandthewaywewouldspendhourstalkingaboutourcountriesandthewaywegrewup.ButmostofallImissmybestfriend.
Iwillplacethemomentswe’vesharedtogetherinatimecapsuleandhideitinthemostsecretplaceofmyheart.Andmaybe20yearsfromnow,iforwhenwemeetagain,maybethenwecanbothopenthecapsuletogetherandberemindedofourwonderfulfriendship.
Gosh,mylifestinks!ImeanIfinallymeettherightguyandhe’snotavailable.I’minlovewithyoubutIcan’tbewithyou.
But,I’vegottotellyou,forthefirsttimeinmonthsIcanfinallysmilebecausealthoughyoudidn’tsaymuchthelasttimeyoucalledIknewyoustillcared.
Youcankeepondenyingit,youcankeephidingfromit,buttrustmeyouareonlylyingtoyourself.EverydayIaskmyselfwhy…whydoIfeelthisway?Whycan’tIstoplovingyou?Thenitdawnedonme…youputvoodooonme!Justkidding.
BeforeIgoIwantyoutoknowthatyouwillalwayshaveaspecialplaceinmyheart,andlikeI’vesaidmanytimesbefore,Idonotregretanythingwe’vedone.TheonlythingIregretisyoutellingmeyoulovemebecausesincethenyouhavegivenmenothingbutthecoldshoulders.
Pleasedon’tbescared,Iwantnothingbutyourfriendship,well…IdowantmorebutIamwillingtosettle.Iamnottryingtomakeyoufeelbadorpushyoufurtheraway.Iamjusttryingtomakeyouunderstandwhat’sinmyheart.
Iloveyouwithallmyheart…andIwillalwaysloveyou,G.J.P.
Lovealways,
Melissa